The Hot Girl Run: An Investigation

I learned a new term this week: “Hot Girl Run.” As a runner for the better part of a decade now, I was immediately intrigued by this exciting new niche. But what exactly is a Hot Girl Run? How does it differ from a regular run? And how hot, exactly, do you have to be to qualify?

WHAT IS A HOT GIRL RUN?

According to this Refinery29 article, the Hot Girl Run traces its roots to the TikTok sensation Hot Girl Walk. However, unlike the lengthy commitment that apparently defines the Hot Girl Walk, the Hot Girl Run is a quick jaunt you can fit into whatever amount of time you have. The idea is to give your brain a good shakeout – and feel like a dime while doing it.

Lucky for all of us who don’t have modeling contracts to justify claims to hotness, the Hot Girl element of this is a state of mind, not a state of genetics. Think hot, be hot, I guess.

In fact, having read the article, I would argue that most of it is just regular running advice (Eat a snack! Drink some water! Wear quality shoes! Have a positive attitude!) with the exception of your outfit. To have a proper Hot Girl Run, you must wear workout gear that makes you feel cute. Ideally this will be a matching set of some kind. I really can’t emphasize the matching set enough.

MY HOT GIRL RUN

I like cute running gear as much as the next gal, so I decided to try a Hot Girl Run for myself. Alas, I only own one true matching workout set, and it doesn’t have pockets. Lame. But I put it on. I added pretty braids and my awesome running sunglasses.

Then I took some selfies. The Hot Girl Run was born of social media, so I felt like I should.

By now mildly possessed by the Hot Girl mindset, I took more once I got outside. I felt kinda self-conscious doing it a hid under a tree while I snapped my shots, which is not nearly as Hot Girl of me, but what can ya do. Call it Hot Girl Run (Away and Hide).

I left my apartment complex and walked across the street to my start point. On the way, I did notice a dude look over at me as he walked toward the beach. Was it my Hot Girl outfit (affectionate), or my Hot Girl outfit (derogatory)? No way to be sure.

So I went for a quick run. I frequently knock out a quick two-miler in the afternoon, and… this felt the same. The cute outfit was a nice touch, I suppose, but I still spent a fair amount of the run annoyed that I didn’t have any pockets. I’ve become really attached to side pockets.

By the end of it, I certainly felt much hotter in the literal sense – afternoon runs in Puerto Rico are no joke – but I can’t say a felt much hotter figuratively. Maybe my run tolerance is too high after all these years.

MY MINDSET COULD PROBABLY STAND TO BE HOTTER

Being a Hot Girl is very confidence-based. I’m not sure I have enough of it to truly embody the Hot Girl Runner. That being said, I definitely love the idea of wearing fun running gear for the serotonin boost, and I am duly inspired to look into purchasing some more matching workout clothes. (WITH pockets this time.) Perhaps, like so many physical pursuits, I just need practice. I may vanquish the Hot Girl Run yet!

(If you’re a new proponent of the Hot Girl Run, know that I kid because I love. Welcome to the sport! Yet beware – sure, it’s all spandex and 10 minute sprints in the beginning, but eventually you’ll sign up for a race and THEN WE’LL HAVE YOU. 😜)

P.S. I can only assume the Hot Girl Run, while ostensibly earmarked for the feminine among us, is open to all genders. Good sartorial choices, however, are non-negotiable. Respect the medium.

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